Most of us have had a hard time adjusting to the demands and fluctuations of our spouses.Sometimes, they just seem unreasonable.We find it difficult to think calmy and level headed, and would like to retaliate,just to get even.
Often we ignore the prompting from within and act rashly.And we regret.Small differences of opinion escalate into arguments, quarrels and conflicts.All because we did not pause to listen.To our own inner guide.Does not that still small voice inside you tell you to wait?
It is hard not to retaliate when you are hurt by cruel words.We are surrounded by such a world. A retaliatory world.The governments, the judiciaries and the entire world acts out their hatred of evil by hating it more, by punishing it.The Gandhis,the Martin luther kings and the Mother Teresas did their best.Perhaps their efforts have not gone to waste.The fact that sane voices still remain here, proves it.
Gandhi used to say:If all of us lived by the rule an eye for an eye, we would all soon be blind.
In the middle of an argument, when you are getting excited, please wait.If you will wait a few minutes, or if possible, a few hours before reacting on impulse, it will be something that you will be glad that you did.
Deep, slow breathing helps to quieten emotions.Counting the breaths and holding to a small count(say 4 or 6) is effective in calming the mind.Do not overdo it.A few rounds will be enough.
Deep within, we are all children who lost the oasis of unconditional love somewhere in our early childhood.Some of us may never have known such an oasis exists.
Remember, your spouse is also a lost child like yourself.He/She is probably expressing a longing for unconditional love from deep within.Try to awaken that feeling of love and consideration inside of yourself, and give love, without expecting. See what happens !
