Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Befriending your feelings

We live in an era of repressed feelings. We are taught that our feelings are not ok, from child hood, so we are afraid of expressing our feelings freely. The child expresses itself without fear, without reservation; that is why it is attractive.

The first step in asserting your right to be an individual is to be comfortable with your feelings. We need to recognize and accept that it is ok to be angry, that we have a right to be angry. In fact, we need to honor our emotions. I do not remember where I read that, but that is a very important point.

When we learn to accept our feelings as normal, we come to accept our worth as individuals, as unique beings. Unique does not become just another word. We recognize our uniqueness as the uniqueness of a diamond.

When you feel intensely negative feelings building up inside, do not try to stifle them; instead, keep asking yourself: Why do I feel this way? Again and again. It will be useful to write down the question many times. The subconscious may reveal the answer at an appropriate time. But, as you keep questioning yourself without being critical or angry with yourself, you will feel the pressure of the negativity gradually melt away.

This is not a panacea, not a one-time-solution. You have to work at it day after day, may be a minute at a time, or as much as you are comfortable with. It can bring out latent talents you never thought you had, it can transform you into a more peaceful person. When we are comfortable with ourselves, we can be comfortable with others.

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